For the past one week, she’d been staying at Helwa’s and A’in’s house, which is only next door but heck, did it make a lot of difference. My life had never been so serene. But then one morning when I woke up and walked outta my room, I was greeted by the sight of her sitting on the dining table.
I don’t intend to be mean but I’ve never had any trouble with my housemates before. She, though, is an exceptional case. Even the sight of her annoys me.
You think you’re so cute is it masuk kotak???
Because she’s so cute (I don’t deny she’s cute ok?), people tend to say I’m the mean one!!!! LOOKS CAN BE DECEIVING PEOPLE. It’s like an Orphan situation going on where I’m the only one who knows her true colours but when I try pointing it out to everyone, they just look at me with an “are you crazy?” expression.
I mean, really!!
The other 4 mums (sebab ktorg kongsi 5 org) always scold me because I often neglect my maternal duties. Just because I forked out money for her doesn’t make me her mum! I’m her financier! Like sugar mummy like that. You cannot buy love ok.
Why she annoys me? WHY SHE ANNOYS ME? Let’s see:
1) She doesn’t walk, she STRUTS.
Like she owns the house or something. As if saying I have to bow to her every time she passes by. HELLO YOU’RE THE CAT.
Broom-like tail. Swish swish. Kalau tolong sapu rumah takpe jugak.
2) She swishes her tail at anyone.
Especially when you’re doing something important. Masuk fur dia dalam mulut and all. Ptuik.
3) She ignores everyone.
SERIOUSLY. If you wanna cuddle her? Forget it. Confirm lari. She walks passed you like you don’t exist.
4) She tries to escape at any chance, by any means possible.
Couldn’t open the balcony doors- heck, couldn’t even open the windows when she’s around. And if someone rang the doorbell, she’d be the first one in front of the door. We have to race with her everytime we wanna go out.
Whatcha looking at? No, you get off. That’s my chair!
5) She thinks she’s all that.
Isn’t it obvious from the way she carries herself???
6) She’s functionally hay-wired.
I tak tipu. One minute she could be still and quiet, another minute she’s climbing you up. One minute she’s lying down, the next she tiba-tiba kejar you. Crazy cat.
7) She’s picky.
She wants to eat the Rs 35 per packet cat food jugak. Baik I beli cornetto satu.
Her I’m-thin-look-at-me days are over. OVER I tell you.
8 ) She’s fat.
I don’t like fat cat. Period.
9) She’s unhygienic.
Even though my housemates give her a bath once in 2 weeks, wash her paws and butt everytime she poops, I still have to wash my hands whenever I come into contact with her.
I could rant on and on about her faults. Try me.
OK FINE. I KNOW HER BEING A CAT MEANS SHE COULDN’T THINK. I KNOW THAT OK. And I might seem wacko for getting angry at a cat. Me with the so-callled higher intelligence. But well, I wanna see you try living with her!
Yeah we’ve spend thousands on her. You can find money but you can’t replace the tranquility I’ve lost!! This pet is not increasing my life span- it’s making me die faster!
I’m not a complete cow. I was kind to her when she first entered this household. I mean, I played with her and all lah. But now she could run outta the house and I won’t even worry.
Ok, that sounded as if I were mean. I can be nice. If her food and water bowls are empty, I’d fill them. And if my housemates aren’t around, I’d play with her. That might only happen once in a blue moon but I still do at certain occasions.
The first and the last time she slept on my bed.
My mum might be thinking by now, “Omg I’ve trained my daughter well.”.
I don’t think I dislike cats though. I just dislike this particular cat.
The fact that I even bother to write a post out of this shows that I might like her. Just a bit, maybe.