Truthfully, I have nothing much to say. Wtfshehasnothingtosaythenwhyblog?

 

Study leave has started and for someone who always complain about having none before, yeah, it’s making me nervous. Because at the end of it, Professional exams await. The thought that my first year of medicine is ending only in a month thrills and scares me at the same time. It’s been a long year,no doubt but to finally see it ends? *gulp*

 

The carry marks are out. I’m guessing most of us are probably sweating our armpits out to calculate how much we’ve to score in the Professional exams. My marks for the 3rd IA sucked big time but thankfully my carry marks aren’t that horrifying. I’ve to pass my professional exams to pass my first year.

 

How hard is passing right? That’s only like half of the total marks *second gulp*

 

Anyhow, that’s my last shoot; this final exam. Ok la, I know there’s still viva and the supplementary exams but I definitely am NOT planning to sit for those. I DON’T CARE IF THE WHOLE WORLD SETS ON FIRE, TO HELL ARE THOSE GONNA HAPPEN.

 

Suddenly emotional ^_^

 

The thought of having to repeat the whole first year is torturing. I’d rather stop buying Mars bars no, let’s choose something more dramatic- ok, SHOES than to allow that to happen.

 

Seriously. I WOULD RATHER GIVE UP ON SHOES. Darn, I just saw these clear sneakers in a magazine. I want one!

 

spunk-clr spunk-pur spunk-grn 

Wanted clear sneakers at $49.99

 

White is my favourite ^_^ Your colourful socks actually show when you wear them. If you wear white socks with the white clear sneakers, would they pass off as your every day school uniform shoes? Most importantly, TAK PENAT NAK CUCI KASUT BWAHAHAHA.

 

Eh what the heck. I was talking about my exams.

 

Ok. EXAMS. I’ve never been the smart type. I’m not one of those people who don’t really read much but would still excel in exams. If I didn’t study, I failed. FULL STOP. There won’t be any other ending. I’m usually positive about that. Not the failing part. The couldn’t-grasp-things-as-fast part. Even if life isn’t fair, I know Allah is πŸ™‚ There are other things I’m really good at like wasting money.

 

But this time, I really lashed out. Probably because it seems that no matter how hard I study, I still couldn’t score. And I guess I’m sick of that. Sick and envious of the ‘smart’ people. Then Deeba told me to stop comparing myself with other people. And…I didn’t realise I was doing just that until she scolded me. I never compared myself. I usually couldn’t be bothered about everyone else (except during gossiping :P).

 

Somehow things don’t work out that well for me. I feel like giving up at times. Maybe this path is just not meant for me. Maybe what I should be doing is somewhere out there.

 

But what the fuck, those are bullshit. I know that much.

 

Each of us has different paths. Different destiny. It might be grueling, might be pain staking but I’ll reach there soon enough. Some are just born with thick and long eyelashes. But some need to stick on fake eyelashes and put on coats of mascara just to get the same effect. More efforts, but the results are there nevertheless.

 

I just need a new mascara πŸ™‚

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