I can’t believe it.

I failed the goddamn driving test.


Just kidding. I passed.
That’s it. I passed. No juicy story behind it.
Oh who am I kidding. Of course there is one. Otherwise I wouldn’t bother mentioning it here.

It started like this………
I woke up at 7 am on Wednesday morning. Make that 7.10 am; I hit snooze once. Took a bath and got ready. Then I waited for my driving instructor to pick me up at 8 am.

8.09 am Switched on the tv.

8.17 am Still waiting.

8.32 am Still waiting.

8.42 am A honk sounded.

Anyways, I got onto the car. She was talking on the phone about an urgent matter. She mentioned the word URGENT. Like I cared. She’s bloody late. That was until she turned to me and uttered these words: I thought your driving test was tomorrow. 24th is today. And now we’re late. Sorry, it’s my fault.
At that moment, I TRULY cared. My throat and lips went dry (actually, maybe it was because I was fasting). I started shaking (darn, I knew I should have put a sweater on).

” We’ll try and ask whether we can postpone yours to tomorrow.”

All those signs instantly subsided. Ok, so maybe they didn’t have anything to do with fasting or the rain.

Less than 10 minutes away from IMMS,
” Do you have your flight ticket with you? We may need it to support our plead.” She sounded like she’s in court. No, of course I didn’t have it with me. Who goes around carrying flight ticket in their bags? Not when the flight’s still 4 days away. So we went back to my house to fetch it and headed to JPJ. She kept saying it’s her fault which was good because a) she was the one who got the dates mixed up, not me and b) she’s the one who was late. We met a certain En. Hairul and got my form re-printed. Turned out, my original form was cancelled because I didn’t show up on time and I still had to take the test that day. But instead of number 22, I got the last turn.

Smooth. Real smooth.

By the time I waited at IMMS, I was one nervous wreck. I’d only went on that hill thingy for 3 times! And what if I’d forgotten the test roads? It’s been 2 months for God’s sake.
*Breathing exercise; breathe in deeply, and breathe out. Repeat 3 times.

Waited for a while. And then came my turn. Little hill, little kancil’s coming. Little kancil started climbing the little hill. Then braked. Pulled the handbrake up, released brake- fuh. Then came the hard part. Recalled the steps; pulled handbrake up, hit gas, released clutch slowly until the car jerked and maintained, added more gas and pulled handbrake down. The car started going backwards.

Fuck.

I hit brake instantly. Both tyres were still in the yellow line. Ok, one more time. Step 1, step 2, step 3, step 4, step 5. Little kancil’s started going down the little hill merrily. Succeeded. Then I accomplished parking the car and the 3-point turn. Easy.
Went inside and sat down. Clock showed 12.33 pm. Waited for the road test.
2 JPJ officers, 2 Kancil, 32 candidates. You do the math.

waitedwaitedwaitedwaitedwaited.

A woman actually brought her own cushion seat. Lol.


waitedwaitedwaitedwaitedwaitedwaitedwaited.


A black Satria arrived. Out came a woman and her daughter. The daughter’s driving instructor approached them. The woman said, ” Eh, we could do this inside. It’s really hot here.” to which the man gave her an amused look and deliberately tried to soothe her that it’s not that hot. Well, yeah, it just stopped raining. Waving her hands at her daughter, she said, “Mesti jaga kulit. Panas, panas. Jom masuk dalam,”

So people like that really do exist. Wow.

Enough already about weird people.

waitedwaitedwaitedwaitedwaitedwaitedwaitedwaitedwaitedwaitedwaitedwaited.

Dad and Mum arrived at 4.30 pm to fetch me. The thing was, I still hadn’t sat for the test. Dad offered to go through the road tests and I agreed. Big mistake. Big big mistake. He drove like how I would drive. 40 km/hour, signalled at every turn, stopped at every junction. When you’re the passenger, it just made you impatient. And it made you told your dad that showing Road B was good enough and that you should return to IMMS for fear of missing your turn.

Yeah, I was bluffing. I knew there were still 6 others before me.

My dad stayed with me. By that, I really meant it. He stood next to me, talked to my driving instructor and her husband, gave advices, asked whether I could do it, gave some more advices. Suddenly I felt like I was sitting for SPM all over again. Only that he’s not holding a KFC plastic bag. And I realised, it was small things like this that I would miss when I’m back in Shah Alam. Having your dad picking you up from school, asking for your parents’ permissions before going out (not that I ever did that but this is just an example). Stuff like that.

Finally, at 5.59 pm, my turn came. That’s ONE MINUTE TO SIX. Which meant I waited for approximately FIVE HOURS AND THIRTY MINUTES. Oh well, at least by this time there wouldn’t be too many cars. That’s what I thought.

That’s what I thought.

Pergi jalan B.”

Thank God.

The sun bid goodbye and the moon came up. It was bloody dark making me hard to see the roads even with the headlights on (curses to our stingy government) and there were A LOT OF CARS. The traffic was horrendous. Damn, damn.

I think I did pretty well.

So now, I have my P license kept in my wallet along with my many many credit cards. Ahah! As if =P

Never will I go behind the driving wheels again.


Just kidding.

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