My temper nowadays’s near the surface. Just waiting to erupt. I’ve made my decision. Yet I keep going back to it. Everything seems so distant. Everything seems so ugly.
Why? Up to now, why? What else can I do to prove myself? What do they want?
Those words. I heard them. I tried shutting them out, but I heard them. I don’t trust myself to speak anymore. I don’t dare asking questions. I’m scared. For once, I feel so scared.